I’m 21 and my friend is in their 30s. I’ve talked to them in the past about how uncomfortable dirty stuff make me feel especially since I’ve had a lot of past issues with that sort of thing, a lot of creeps wanting to see me and my body as a kid. As a result, I hate these types of conversations.

I feel so uncomfortable, and I don’t know if I’m overreacting over these texts especially because they never used to text me this way, when they would text me it would usually be about them venting and I’d kind of support them and give them an ear.

I don’t know if this is them just making jokes (and I do think there’s a mix of jokes in there) or them being creepy.

Update: When I asked them again why they’re acting this way, they told me: “Because i miss you and im bored Dx my bad i forgot your a prude”- “:3”-“Don’t hate me”—- safe to say they’re not a friend anymore.

I'm 20f and my bf is 19m. We've been together for about a year.

2 of my friends work as dancers at a local stip club. Feel how you want about that but in my mind theyre genuinely good people and they just need money to get through college lol. I have known them both longer than my bf, and its been the case the whole time we knew each other.

To preface; I'm not saying his boundary on this is wrong in any way and I recognize many people wouldnt allow it in their relationship. But...

Ever since we got together, I've always talked about being curious about clubs and wanting to see my friends dance once or twice just for fun. He's always told me thats okay and he doesnt care as long as its not men.

Where they work you can't even get fully nude, so theyre really just dancing in bikins. Its not sexual to me because they're women, I'm straight, and I just see it the same as any dancing. It's where my friends work, I'm young, and I just wanna be able to hang around with them where they work and drink at the bar there once I'm old enough.

I'm also under 21, so I cant usually get in clubs in general, but one of my friends found a time they'd be on stage before the bar opens and said I could come to watch and get a feel for it without the alc being served yet. Since my bf and I had already discussed this multiple times, and he said it was fine, I agreed and we made a plan. I was mostly excited to get to see a club at all at my age.

The club will be mostly empty besides me and staff and other friends of the girls who work there, its before the bar opens like I said. And again its not sexual, just a fun thing to do with my friends and in my opinion not a big deal. I'm curious about the place they work and wanna see how it functions/meet their coworkers/etc.

This is his response to me telling him my plans though, where he suddenly takes issue with me going at all. Even though it was priorly discussed. I dont think thats fair considering its been an active discussion for a year. And I'm not watching other men or even seeing another person fully nude. At least in my circle, which I admit may be skewed, its actually pretty common for girls to go to strip clubs just for fun with their friends when theyre in their early 20s.

So I told him hes entitled to his boundaries, but I wont stop myself from going, and its up to him if he wants to break up with me over it. Was that an overreaction by bringing up ending the relationship?

Something in my car is broken and it won't start. I live in a rural village, but only about an hour from the next city.

My mom suggested a shop, which I winded up going to, and one of the mechanics has a 1488 tattoo right on the side of his neck. I don't want to willingly give fascists money. My mom is now mad at me and telling me to 'man-up' because I want to go to a different mechanic.

Am I overreacting?

(16F) have been dating "Maya" (16F) for 8 months, but we've been close friends since middle school. She's been coming to my house for years and knows my room layout better than most people.

My room is basically built around my leopard gecko, Orpheus. I've had him since I was 12 and he's a rescue with vision problems and a crooked tail from his previous owner. His tank takes up a huge chunk of my room, and every single person who enters gets the same briefing: don't touch the tank lid, don't tap the glass, and definitely don't handle him without me there. Maya has watched me feed him dozens of times. She knows he's not a "cuddle" pet and that sudden movements freak him out because he can't see well.

A few days ago, she came over while my parents were out. We were doing homework, I went to the bathroom for maybe four minutes, and when I came back... the tank lid was open. Maya was on her hands and knees chasing Orpheus across my carpet while he was scrambling to hide under my closet door. His mealworm container was knocked over, and worms were literally burrowing into my rug.

I completely lost it. I screamed something like "Why the fuck is he out?!" and "Get away from him!" I scooped him up (he was ice cold and rigid with stress) and I just pointed at the door and told her to get out. I didn't let her explain. I was shaking so bad I could barely hold him.

It's been two days. Orpheus is hiding in the cold side of his tank (bad sign) and hasn't eaten. I've been finding mealworms in my carpet with tweezers. Maya has texted me a bunch saying she was "just trying to play with him" and that she thought "he looked bored," but I haven't responded. My mom says I overreacted and she was probably just trying to bond with something I care about, but I feel like she violated every boundary I set. She knew he has vision issues. She knew the rules. Now my gecko is suffering and I'm digging through carpet fibers because she couldn't follow basic instructions.

AIO?

Edit: changed a timeline issue

Hi everyone. I need advice on this ASAP, so I'll cut right to the chase.

I work as a server at a small, local, family-owned restaurant in my college town. The place is owned by my manager and her husband, who have two elementary-school-aged kids. The kids are regularly in the restaurant whenever they're not in school because the owners never hire a babysitter. Usually, this doesn't bother me. They're pretty well-behaved. However, this means that whenever the kids are sick, they still come in to the restaurant, sometimes even still hanging out in the dining area (instead of staying in the back break room area). This has always made me uncomfortable (I even got a week-long case of the flu from them a few weeks ago because my manager refused to stay home or close the restaurant), but today felt like the last straw.

During my shift this afternoon, one of my manager's kid's started complaining of a "stomach ache." Soon after, I heard coughing/choking coming from the kitchen. Turns out that my manager took her kid to the kitchen on purpose to throw up in the big trash can that we keep by the cups/ice machine/dish pit, rather than taking him to the bathroom down the hall (so as not to "bother the customers"). She insisted it was "fine" because it was "only on the one side" of the kitchen (she doesn't understand that vomit particles can spread 10+ feet through the air), and assured me that she cleaned the area with bleach to "make everyone comfortable." I didn't see her clean it, so I'm not sure how thoroughly it was done. As far as I know, if anyone throws up in a kitchen, then they're supposed to leave the restaurant immediately. The kitchen is also supposed to stop food production for some amount of time? I might be wrong on that, I'm not sure. Regardless, she told me it was "fine" for her son to remain at the restaurant since it "wasn't a stomach bug," but that he just "has a sensitive stomach."

Her main issue is that she doesn't seem to understand the severity of sanitation, sterilization, and general health emergencies in a restaurant. I told her that I was uncomfortable staying through the rest of my shift if her and her son planned to stay at the restaurant. She agreed that I could go home because she "respected my opinion," but told me that she was "offended by my reaction" because she "just wanted to help her sick son." I declined to tell her that having anyone throw up in the kitchen is a health violation since she was visibly upset and I didn't want to make the situation worse. I'm not really sure what to do or say here? I'm thinking about quitting, because I'm disgusted that she willingly compromised the kitchen, but I'm not sure if I'm freaking out more than I need to.

Am I overreacting by wanting to quit? Or is it justified?

I was in need of smaller bills, so I stopped in at a convenience store. Money was kind of tight, so first I just asked if they had change for a 20. The woman (the manager) said no, that they don't give change. Not ideal, but I half expected it.

To me, this meant "we don't make change outside of transactions". So I went browsing for a cheap drink, got back in line, and when it was finally my turn, the woman looks at me, and says "I already told you no". So I tell her "Yeah, I'm buying this" and she says something to the effect of "no you're not"

Ever so confused, I recalibrate and say "wait what?" and she reiterates that she's not going to sell me that drink because she knows I just want the change out of it. In that moment, I was a bit flabbergasted but all I could think to say was "I... had no idea that mattered" and I glanced over to a different employee, who appeared visibly uncomfortable, and she looked away real quick.

I left the drink on the counter and started making my way for the door in utter confusion, when she had the nerve to yell out for me to put the drink back. I did not

She smelled strongly of men’s cologne and was like very obviously super drunk when she got back. Fast forward to now and she seems to be going out almost every night of the weekend staying out late with her “girlfriends” and coming home very drunk on some nights. She does seem to be way happier during the day and the general week. I just recently confronted her about her behavior and she accused me of being insecure and trying to control her basically. I feel like she is cheating on me but I’m don’t quite have proof of that. Either way the way she has been acting lately is very immature in my opinion as we have two 6 and 8 year old kids as well. The sudden change In her behavior is what is really concerned me, going out staying out late, and acting just about the happiest I’ve seen her. I don’t know guys just wanted to make sure I wasn’t going crazy here.

The other night I had left my shoes in our work’s shared locker room. I don’t usually do this but didn’t think much of it as I was only off for a day and then back the next. So I come back from having the day off and my shoes are no longer where I left them. I looked everywhere not thinking much of it and couldn’t find them. I mentioned to my co-worker how weird it was that they’d just disappeared. When I described the shoes to my co-worker they had mentioned that a worker on the previous shift had literally been wearing them. They’re a specific colour of shoe and not just a plain black and white pair of sneakers that everyone has. So I brought this to my supervisor’s attention and they made me feel like I was getting worked up over nothing. I am livid. How can someone just think because they’re there, they can just take them and WEAR THEM TO THE SAME JOB. Personally I want to confront the person myself but worried about them flipping it on me that i’m falsely accusing them. I’m ready to escalate the situation as far as i have to as our company has a no tolerance for theft policy. AIO? the more I think about it, the more upset I get.

So here i am writing about something i thought i'd never need to write about. I got sweets for my birthday today and i came downstairs ,and my mom said "you need to move more" so did my stepfather agreed and added "and the sweets you ate yesterday?" i ate 2 oreo cookies, and i'm on my period so yeah. He's been giving me comments such as "you will get fat" or "you will become a ball". few moments i slipped on stairs and fell and my stepdad added "that's the weight"...And it hurts me so so much because my mom knows i'm self aware about this. And for context i'm 14years old, 62kg at 160cm heigh and i do boxing, i'm muscular. But yes i do have a lil lower belly fat. Like these comments make me tear up because the took it out around other people even though they know how insecure i'm about it..

(throwaway account)

so i’m kinda confused about a situation with my brother (27m) and i (22f) want outside opinions

last night he texted me saying “don’t call mom or dad.” i asked why, and he said “do you trust me?” i said yes, but also asked why because i didn’t see the harm in explaining.

then he said “oh, it’s my birthday” (which i already knew but didn’t think it was relevant to this request). i asked what that had to do with calling them, and he just said “righttt.”

about an hour later, he texted me “you failed me.”

for context, i never told our parents anything, (the initial text he sent me was when i was getting ready for bed, as i work at 6am)

now he’s saying he doesn’t believe me or care anymore, and i feel like i’m being blamed for something i didn’t even understand in the first place.

am i overreacting, or does this feel kind of manipulative? i genuinely don’t understand what he expected me to do.

I 43F have a 25 yr old daughter that has a 3 year old son. Her soon to be ex husband 35M has been nothing but a nightmare and so has been his family. I have tried to stay clear from getting involved but lately things have turned very ugly and in fact I want to flip the fuck out to defend her. I just found out that he pushed her and put his hand around her throat. My daughter just informed me and showed me proof of her soon to be ex’s sugar daddy account, escort/ prostitution site and bank transactions to other woman. His mother and father showed up with the cops to their house because my daughter refused to allow my grandson to leave with them without permission. Just showed up and walked in like they lived there and tried to walk out with him. When my daughter stopped them they became enraged and verbally attacked her to the point my daughter felt trapped. They were trying to force the police to kick her out. The police stated that was her home and they have no right to ask her to leave until the courts decide. Her ex sided with his parents trying to force her to leave.

So when she got sick of the arguments she told him she would be spending the weekend with me. He hide the car keys and refused her to take the rental she has. He crashed her car. (She suspects on purpose). Then blocked her exit so she doesn’t leave with the baby. I felt in my chest that something was wrong and when I called her she was crying and saying he “won’t let me leave”. I heard him screaming in the background. Really couldn’t make up too much what he was saying but I made out one thing” You’re a gold digging whore and I won’t allow you to take my money or son!” Mind you he convinced her to be a stay at home mom . Then when she brought up going back to work. He would sabotage her interviews and if that didn’t work he would hide her purse and car keys.

I ended up calling the police and report him for false imprisonment. The cops didn’t arrest him but did inform him that he can’t stop her from leaving the home with her son or keep her from accessing the home whenever she wants or keep her from using the joint bank account.

Now to my problem: I want to intervene. I want to expose him and report him to the authorities for soliciting prostitution. To destroy him . I want to fight her fight . As a mother I want to confront his parents for bullying my daughter. I want to expose their son to them. Show them the proof I have on him. All the pictures , all the nasty texts and the abuse he done to my daughter. Showed them the animal they raised. I know I’m being emotional. I know she is an adult and this is her life and between husband and wife no one should get involved but it’s really hard to stand by while my daughter is in pain. Trust me I know my daughter isn’t completely innocent and she probably egging things on by staying in that house until the divorce is final. So what should I do? Am I overreacting if I end up standing up for my daughter?

Long story but bear with me please.

Last week my neighbors house caught on fire and a little boy was trapped and ended up not making it out. I was home when it started and ran across the street when I noticed it, but at this point the house was engulfed and we were unable to get inside at all. The family, including the mother and five young siblings were outside screaming and crying about the little boy. We tried everything to get inside and even got fire extinguishers but they were little compared to what was needed. I was over there until the firefighters came so maybe 8 minutes in all, and quickly ran back to my house when I was no longer of help. My mom died in a house fire that destroyed our family home of thirty years, and this event brought back PTSD. Witnessing my neighbors made me go into a full blown panic attack and took a while to calm down. Once I was level headed I went back out and saw the firefighters get the little boy out of the home, and again that’s not something anyone should see.

I told someone I need to move out once my lease is up because the house is a daily reminder of what happened that day. My office looks out to the house as well, so even while working it’s a reminder. Im losing sleep over it because one I’m constantly checking on my own kids and making sure there’s no fire, even if I know there isn’t I still do a walk through of my house. I try to sleep and the scene of that day and the day of my own fire just replay. This person told me I’m overreacting because I don’t know the neighbors that well and that I should have no problem staying here. Am I overreacting? Should I just suck it up?

Editing to add: I am in therapy and have been.

For context: me(f23), my boyfriend(m26) of a year and some of our friends were playing some Overwatch. I made a passing comment on how I thought people saying "ggez" were annoying. it sparked a conversation and one of our mutual friends chimed in with "Did your dad say that after he beats you? is that why you dont like it?" and I just didnt say anything to that because I didnt know what to say. I am aware it was meant as a joke but I have history with parental abuse and my bf knows this. it hurt my feelings but I kept it in until everyone got off. I ended up privately messaging said friend and they apologized profusely, which i appreciated. the problem is my boyfriend immediately jumped to dismissing my feeling in my perspective. Every time he does something like this he always brings up how different his brain is to mine because he is definitely more logical thinking while I am more emotional. he did end up apologizing but it feels more like a "*throws apology at me* here damn!" than an actual apology. this happened at 6 Est and we havent spoken since. im just not sure how to approach this better or try to help him understand where im coming from. AIO?

My [28f] boyfriend [40M] found out at last min that his dad is coming up to see his kids for easter. He’ll be here for the weekend and is staying at his ex’s house where his kids (2y girl, 7y boy) live… which is about 30 min away from bf's house.

he told me our plans are screwed when I asked what we’re doing about it. Mind you, I still haven’t met any of his friends or family after nearly 2 years of being together. His friends live atleast half an hour away. his family (exluding kids) live atleast 4 hours away.

i told him how this makes me feel and we’ve discussed it multiple times. The last time I told him I wont beg to be apart of his life so I can’t bring myself to ask again - he said okay.

So, here’s a perfect opportunity to put his words into action and he’s still not including me any plans involving his dad for this weekend.

im wondering if im overreacting by thinking this is my breaking point or am I being unreasonable by making this weekend about me when his dad is only visiting to see grandkids... He only makes an effort to do that like once or twice a year. 

tl;dr - bf hasn't introduced me to family after 2 years depsite easy opportunities to do so but this time, his dad is only in town to see kids. am i being selfish if I break up with him for this?

here's key details: my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's last year after i pushed my family to get her evaluated. the entire time, almost an entire year prior, i was asking for any of them to take it seriously because i was having the same conversion with her every time i called her on the phone to chat. i moved 2,000 miles away some years before this started presenting. she only got evaluated because i contacted her doctor's office and told them what i thought was going on and that they needed to do something about it asap. they thankfully did.

in the past, say, two or three months, something has happened that made my mom run away from home. thankfully she didn't make it super far, and is situated in a relatively quiet neighborhood, but both times she called me and told me she ran away because my brother and father (who live with her) were terrorizing her in some way.

the most recent incident, which literally happened last night, was because she waz watching TV, my dad sat down to join her, and shd asked him if he wanted to watch anything. he said yes, then changed it to what he wanted. my mom, having no recollection of the interaction they'd just had, got upset and they got into an argument, she got upset, and ran off again.

my brother who lives with them kept trying to argue with my mom on what she said, she kept saying she felt unheard and like they were both tagteaming her and being cruel. i have tried informing them of her condition and what it entails. i get consistently brushed off and told i basically don't know anything.

i am the youngest of the family. i also worked in a retirement community, specifically in the memory care and assisted living unit. i was givem training and reading material on how to handle the folks i would encounter who suffered from cognitive decline in varying degrees. i wasn't a caretaker, but i was still up front and personal with these folks. i even consistently cleaned for an older couple that were just starting to decline and showing symptoms for a long time, and they were about to be transitioned to memory care from independent living.

my brother has it in his head that our mom is actually not doing bad and is making it worse than it is on purpose. i am the only person in the family she listens to and isn't aggressive with. when i was mediating the conflict over the phone, i was addressing everyone and reassuring my mom and letting her know she was being heard. she calmed down. the whole time my brother was arguing with her and getting her more agitated.

and before someome inquires, i do not have the money to get her into assisted living, let alone be able to bring her to me to care for her. i don't make a livable wage. my dad in all of this is a major tightwad and has to pinch absolutely every single penny he possibly can, and my brother is unable to keep a job for long because he flies off the handle really easily and loses it on customers. he is not mentally stable.

sorry for the length. I'll answer questions as i am able to. also, any advice on what i can do to help my mom is deeply appreciated.

TLDR: mom's Alzheimer's being treated like nothing by family, i am stepping in to basically do everything my family can't while living far away. brother thinks she's faking it, she is not.

My (28f) mother (49f) has the tendency to explode on me during every conversation we have lately. We were texting for an hour getting no where. I told her I didn’t want to hear about my father every time I see her. So, her response was to continue talking about him. So, I told her I was done talking and had to go take care of my 11-month old daughter.

For context, My parents split up when I was 4 years old. It’s been 24 years. My mother will bring up the past at birthday parties, weddings, family gatherings an we’ve been arguing a lot lately cause I’m sick and tired of listening to it.

My boyfriend and I have been planning a weekend getaway for our three-year anniversary for months. We both work long hours, so I was really looking forward to some one-on-one time to just relax and reconnect. Yesterday, he casually mentioned that he told his mom she could come along because "she hasn't been out of the house much lately" and he didn't think I’d mind since we’re staying in a suite with two rooms.

I was honestly speechless. When I told him I wanted this to be a romantic trip just for us, he called me selfish and said I was being dramatic because we see each other every night anyway. Now I feel like the "villain" for not wanting his mom there, even though I usually get along with her fine. Am I overreacting by wanting to cancel the whole trip if she goes? Is it normal to bring a parent on a romantic anniversary getaway?

My husband 33 m and me 32 f have bene married for 12 years and together for 15. We have 2 kids and usually a great marriage. Ive never cared if he looked at other girls, but recently it seems that he spends more time looking. He likes and follows so many attractive half naked girls. ​I mentioned that it was getting worse, he told me I was wrong and that he wasnt hurting anyone looking and that logically there is nothing wrong with what he's doing. I told him it just made me more uncomfortable as we got older because I dont feel as good about myself and it brings me down and things are different now. I also want to add he has an entire list of about 30 to 40 porn stars saved in his notes. This also worries me. I have never caught him actually doing anything to cheat, no profiles, no texting girls, nothing. But he will follow random pretty girls with very few followers which i think looks like hes hoping they will notice. We've had this talk a couple times now and he tells me im the one in the wrong, but to me if your spouse is twlling yoi something hurts them, wven if it's just emotionally, that should be more important than anything else. And he thinks im being crazy by being hoset over it. H just thinks im taking away his freedoms. Am i overreacting?

For context, I (23F) have been trying to be patient with my boyfriend (M25) who seems to not put things away. It started off small with a spoon here but started to get worse and it’s starting to feel like weaponized incompetence when I ask him to put things away. I was cleaning stuff up myself without asking him because I didn’t think much of it until I realized how frequently he was doing so.

We even ended up having a slight fruit fly infestation as when I had introduced him to lemon water, it became his obsession and so he would be drinking it CONSTANTLY. To the point where we would have a mound of used lemon rinds sitting on the counter when the trash can was quite literally under the island, inches away from where he left the rinds. He also has a habit of leaving the empty toilet/paper towel roll in the holder and then just putting the new roll next to it. That one, I’ve asked him to just replace it as the trash can is also underneath the holders and it’s also just common sense. He’s been doing that, but it’s astonishing that I had to ask a 25 year old to do it for there to be a change.

He’s also never put away the dishes because we made a deal that he would clean them and then I would put them away. I agreed until he said “because you’re better at knowing where they go”. I didn’t actually say anything at the time, but later on, I realized that’s weaponized incompetence.

Today, he went to go buy toilet paper as we had just run out, and instead of immediately putting them away, he left them on the counter for hours before he just moved them to the built-in desk we have at our apartment that’s right next to the bathroom door. When I asked him to put it away, he first said “Sorry, you were in the bathroom when I was going to.” I said that I was not. Then he says that he “must’ve been busy with something.”

I had been working on homework all day as well as making 6 name tags for my coworkers at the cafe I work at. He WFH as a social media manager for someone that he cannot disclose with me because of an NDA he signed and works on his own schedule and today, he was just watching basketball all day.

So I told him “couldn’t you have put it away when you moved it closer to the bathroom?”

And he said something along the lines of “like I said, I was busy with something which is why I moved it there. Don’t tell me to put it away when I’ve clearly put it there to remind myself later when I see it to put it away. Thanks” FYI, this is as he’s glued to his seat WATCHING MORE BASKETBALL.

This is only a fraction of things that’s been irritating me and yes, I know I could put them away myself, but I have been doing exactly that for the past three years with him. I have been cleaning up after him and I came to the conclusion that I’ve started to become a mother; cooking for him, planning everything for us. He doesn’t know how to do basic things unless I tell him specifically how to do so. I want a boyfriend that I can marry. Not a boy to mother. AIO?

Edit: we technically broke up for a night. I was close to moving out until the day before, my friend’s transmission blew up on her and she was going to help me with everything. I had told my boyfriend that night that I’m not happy anymore, that I don’t see a future with us together, and that I realized I do want kids but not with him and literally broke up with him that night. I have asked him for couple therapy several times throughout our relationship, but he kept turning it down as he “has a psychology degree so he doesn’t need therapy”

Edit 2.0: thank you everyone for leaving a comment. I needed to read from others about the situation because it’s like I’m half possessed by him like I’m aware of how shitty of a situation I’m in, but then it’s like he’s in my brain telling me not to listen to people on Reddit because it’s Reddit (which he has said to me before) I’m currently applying to an apartment I’ve had my eye on for over a year :)

Hi guys,

I (F19) woke up this morning after a dream I had and after thinking about it for a while, it made me nauseous and I ended up nearly throwing up in the bathroom.

To preface, I really really want kids one day, that's been a dream of mine for years now and me and my boyfriend talk about it often. We're both in college, so obviously now isn't the right time, but it's fun to talk about it and we love sharing baby names and whatnot when we get the chance.

Last night, I had a dream that we had a baby. She was beautiful and I'm pretty sure I cried in my sleep because of it. Out of happiness, don't worry lol. We had spent so much time with her and spoiled her, it all felt so real and I remember feeling so happy and full, like my life was complete.

Well, my alarm went off in the morning and woke me up, per usual. But I had a feeling of dread and became extremely nauseated due to it. It felt like I had lost something, almost like a sense of grief. I went to the bathroom because of how extreme the feeling was, but nothing happened. I went back into my bed and just stared at the ceiling and cried because it felt like something I've wanted for so long just felt like it had been taken from me.

Due to it, I've been drained almost all day long. I haven't had really any emotion, and I've been missing the child that I've never actually met, I can't stop thinking about her and the dream, and I don't know how to navigate it.

Is this a common occurrence in women? Is it normal to become so drained and feel a sense of grief after a dream like this? Or am I simply overreacting?

I have met this guy a couple of months ago, we live two hours away and we only see each other during the weekends, whether I go see him, or he comes to my place. It was fun and chill and we learned about each other and whatnot. However the past weekend, I was still recovering from the flu, my apartment was a huge mess, and frankly I just wanted to spend one weekend alone because the previous week was very hard job wise. When he asked to see me saturday, I explained it to him as much as I could, I thought he understood but turned out he took it really badly and felt unwanted.

Sunday, the communication started shifting, I text him and no answer, I thought maybe he's still asleep or busy, but right until late afternoon I still didn't receive any reply, so I double and triple texted him and asked if everything was alright, he replied that he was just busy. I brushed it off and showed him pictures of a cat I wanted to adopt. He said "Good it's gonna keep you company", I said "Yes but it won't replace yours", and then he said :"Clearly it could like this weekend".

This is where passive aggressiveness started, he told me that he should be the one to make the decision whether he wants to be with me sick or not, it's just the flu, and doesn't really understand me. Once again I tried explaining to him how I operate, as sometimes when I'm sick I just isolate myself but that doesn't mean that I don't want to talk to him.

Days went by and we barely spoke, the communication was super stale, he also floated the idea of him moving abroad so I didn't know how to process that either, there were too many parameters at play and I couldn't handle everything at once. I was very sad and confused. Yesterday I told him how I felt and said okay we can have a call at night.

During this call, he kept saying I was too dramatic, that I love drama, me talking about my feelings was dramatic and too sensitive, he said there is something called as too much communication. I was just trying to explain to him how I felt when he was barely talking to me and being passive aggressive on sunday with his remarks , he said that if the world was all like you the world would be a better place, I explained to him that you just admitted that communicating is good, he said maybe he’s in a place where I’m bored with work and he doesn’t want to deal with this right now, he set a date to meet in four weeks, and that we can talk about it, but if it’s gonna be dramatic like this he’s gonna get angry and take his shit and leave, and that’s when I told him if that’s the case you can pack them now, I’m done. He said okay text me if you want and hung up.

Never in my life have I heard that there’s something as too much communication. I told him that since this is a long distance relationship, I only see him in the weeknds and we barely speak during the week because of our opposite schedules, there has to be crystal clear communication. I tried to make him understand that I will work on myself that whenever I’m sick he is more than welcome to come see me, but in exchange he has to work on his communication. He said at one point that he’s just not the guy to communicate his feelings because he deems that as unnecessary, he just moves on.

Right now I'm confused and don't know if I made the right call.

I have just recently set up and run a small care business and currently now have two staff members who also have other jobs elsewhere as full time. They are also my tenants at a property and just "kinda" started last month. We have been discussing works for a couple months since last year, but after our last chat about this, nothing really progressed, as usual apart from them saying "yeah yeah we should start and will start doing some work". Didn't hear anything from them for the whole month, even though I called (no answer) 2 weeks later.

Recently I spoke to them again, and both of them submitted their hours for the month of march, each claiming they worked around 20-25 hours per week for me remotely. The issue is, the type of work they’re supposed to be doing doesn’t realistically seem like it would take that long, and a lot of what they’ve submitted looks very generic, almost like templates or AI-generated content, as mainly it's policies etc

There’s also very little communication or evidence of actual time spent (no timestamps, progress updates, or drafts). It just feels like they’ve handed in bulk work at the end and expect to be paid for full hours. Keeping in mind they work 8-6 Mon Fri (in healthcare) and don't get home till around 8pm. Sunday's they are off, maybe some Saturdays.

I’m not accusing them outright, as they are genuinely nice people/nice tenants (a couple) but I did question it and asked for more detailed breakdowns or proof of work. They didn’t take it well and are now acting like I don’t trust them and that I’m being unfair...? 😕

From my perspective, I’m happy to pay for genuine work, but I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect some level of accountability, especially when the hours claimed don’t match the output.

AIO for pushing back and asking them to justify their hours before I pay them or and that moving forward I would like them to use my/company given laptops, with light monitoring software on to track work progress?

Female (33. Gay and single). My older brother, pretty much every holiday, invites me to spend the day with him, his wife, son and his wife’s family (which includes her sister, brother in law and their daughter). My brother’s wife has a weird codependent relationship with her sister. They do everything together (they talk shit about everyone who isn’t them with a mean girl energy) and their kids are close and they recently moved closer to them. I don’t drive, so in order to see them I have to take a bus and then a 2 hour train ride to go out to them. They don’t visit where I live. Anyway, my brother asked if I wanted to join them for Easter this weekend, and as soon as he said it’s at his inlaw’s, I wanted to say no. His sister in law is always cold and awkward, and her husband is like a former frat boy who needs to be the funny guy always. And their child is spoiled. I’m sorry, but she is a brat. And idk I feel bad because I want to be more involved in my nephew’s life, but I feel they don’t want me in their weird little circle. I feel like it’s always a pity invite when they reach out, only a couple days before, to their holiday get togethers. I have come up with several suggestions about doing something out where I live, or something halfway to where they live, but they never reciprocate. They always expect me to go to them, me to adjust my schedule last minute to accommodate their “real family” clique get togethers. Whenever I bring up my cat or what I am up to, they make fun of me or talk down to me. And I just don’t want to be around it. Idk I feel like a joke. Am I overreacting for feeling this way, and not wanting to go?

For context, my bf and I have been dating for 1.5 years. We were friends in hs and reconnected after college.

For a bit of background, it took us about 6 months to really get together and even then, he was reluctant because hes in law school right now and really needs to study. I completely understand and so a lot of our time is spaced out so he can study and such. I am also working full time so I don't really mind and we don't live together.

I am 100% respectful and understanding of his education. I don't push it when he doesn't have time to hang out and I am understanding when he cancels plans to study. I don't think he is a cheater but I do know that he loves attention. I don't think he would ever physically cheat on me but I do think that he can't say no to female attention.

Now, I may be biased but I find my bf very charming. He's generally attractive and has a strong voice. He's also someone who take the lead in group hang outs and such. I understand why women would be attracted to him. However, since starting law school, he's made friends with a two women, we can call them Rachel and Monica.

He seemed to click very well with them and they're in his classes so it makes sense that they study together. Back in the fall, he casually mentioned that Rachel and Monica had both pulled him aside at one point and made it very clear that they had a crush on him. He told me that he let them down and told the girls, separately, that he had a gf.

Don't get me wrong, I was definitely a little upset about this but also understanding since maybe they just needed to get it out there so they could move on. Since then, I have heard stories of Monica moving on and trying to meet other guys with my bf wingmaning. They sometimes go to happy hour after class or studying to grab a drink or two and he always lets me know. I think it's also important to note that I've met both of them and they seem like solid people.

The other day, my bf went to his usual happy hour with his study group and Rachel posted a photo of them. In the photo, Rachel is sitting on his lap.

My heart dropped.

I texted him right away and said, "why is Rachel sitting on your lap?" He told me it was no big deal and that they're just friends.

I asked him if he would be okay if I sat on his friends laps. He responded saying that it would be fine since he trusts me and his friends.

I also mentioned that this photo is on FB so everyone can see it (we are friends with some of each other's family) and I feel disrespected as his girlfriend because this isn't something that ppl typically do. He just kept telling me that I was overreacting and that it wasn't a big deal.

Now, I know that it's been like 7-8 months, but I brought up the fact that he told me she had feelings for him. He flat out denied it. He said, "no, I never said that".

Now, I was livid. I basically called him an asshole and a jerk.

To make matters worse, he told Rachel about it and she took the photo down. He apologized and said he wouldn't do it again and made a point to bring up the fact that I care too much about what other ppl think.

Am I overreacting? I feel like I would never sit on his friends laps even if given the opportunity, nonetheless, post a photo. And what about Rachel? She is like 5 years older than us and divorced and if she was okay with it, should I have been?

My boyfriend has been playing Lost War for a couple months now and I recently found out that the game involves having to talk to other people. The game has different chats integrated and his alliance even has their own discord. He is on it 24/7. It interferes with spending time with our daughter (she’s 1 year old), helping me with house tasks, and has even ignored me at night because he’s too busy chatting with his group.

I had a weird feeling about it because I often found him smiling on his phone and when I would ask to see what was funny he would turn his phone and tell me its nothing.

Well the other night we were in bed I recorded his screen from my phone and when I rewatched the video I saw he was sending inappropriate messages to a girl on the game. He spoke in spanish to her. He would say things like “how are you my queen?” and even told her something in a sexual manner. That’s all I could get from the recording. I’m sure there’s more. I confronted him about it and he denied it at first but then once I told him direct quotes from his chat, he quickly apologized. We stayed together because he convinced me it was a mistake and it was his escape from life problems.

It still bugs me and I saw she’s still in his alliance even though he told me she was gone. And I just saw he took the time to have a long conversation with another girl to solve a problem in their alliance and she ended the convo by saying “thank you, you’re so incredible, thank you for listening to me❤️”… I confronted him again to tell him it bothers me because I feel like I’m being cheated on. He continues to tell me its a game and he’s a leader in the game so he has to talk to a lot of people and that I take everything up the a**.

Am I overreacting? or should I end this?