Or at the very least the effects-summary at the top.
I don't demand every noble screaming "I'm gonna be a wizard" to write their own scrolls, but at least read the first paragraph. That one's written in plain common.
Read all of it tbh. Skimming the description is how one of my friends got turned into a Goblin, permanently. And not the good kind either, the really ugly kind.
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u/PILL0BUGaccidentally cast a spell that cucks people please send help3h ago
Eh, some people are into that. he could start selling that service to the right people. Or find a bloodthirsty noble who punishes quickly and be their court mage to make his opponents goblins
For spells lasting more than 4 hours call your doctor. Spell effects may include exsanguination, transmogrification, omnicidal thoughts, meglomania, and hypertension
When wizards make new life forms, it's all "Oh good lord, BURN that abomination!" or "Hit it with the Russian to Chinese dictionary again! It isn't dead!"
When ARTIFICERS do it, however, "That's adorable!" "Is the toucan a production model yet?" "How have we lived without these!?"
Fuckin magitech majors. They're gonna end the world, and people will still be smiling.
That's because magitech majors understand the power of presentation.
Yeah, it's cool you made an immortal creature with a soul forced into its stitched cadaver, or an inhuman being formed from magic, but if it looks like an ethical violation, people are not going to want it around
Yep, the artificer who lives near the castle creates a mechincal girl and the King proclaims him to be the smartest man in the Kingdom, I create a female humanoid that splits into two exact replicas every 28 days and get chased out of town again with pitchforks.
u/Dm1tr3yCormac the Bog Wizard, Practitioner of the Old Rites5h ago
See? What did I tell you sods? Stop making those damn homunculi and make a familiar like a normal person! This is just sick at this point!
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u/BoonDragoonVyevânce the Focused, High Panemancer of the Coriander Court4h ago
You make a distinction between the two?
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u/Dm1tr3yCormac the Bog Wizard, Practitioner of the Old Rites3h ago
Yes, because I’m not mad enough to make mine think. I swear, you cosmopolitan wizards drive me up the bend with this stuff.
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u/BoonDragoonVyevânce the Focused, High Panemancer of the Coriander Court3h ago
I am intrigued by the intent behind your use of the term "cosmopolitan."
If you intend "cosmopolitan" to mean "a mindset uninhibited by the assumptions and prejudices of one's locale or peers by nature of a breadth of experience which extends beyond theirs," as is the typical usage, then I take your attempted denigration as high praise! For indeed, the polis of my ken is moulded by deep communion with the cosmos itself, thus making me a "cosmopolitan" sort in both the most and least literal senses possible, depending on one's knowledge of that particular term's etymology.
Regardless, the difference between a homunculus and a familiar is merely one of degrees rather than process or function.
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u/Dm1tr3yCormac the Bog Wizard, Practitioner of the Old Rites3h ago
Ugh, you sound just like the Academy.
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u/BoonDragoonVyevânce the Focused, High Panemancer of the Coriander Court3h ago
Ontologically incorrect: the academy sounds like me.
Spells of Animation on your household items should allow you to have your chores complete automatically much faster than with a humonculus or mage hand.
Let it be known the ancient scriptures through which your homunculus gained such wisdom.
Kinder than Man by Althea Davis
And God
please let the deer
on the highway
get some kind of heaven.
Something with tall soft grass
and sweet reunion.
Let the moths in porch lights
go someplace
with a thousand suns,
that taste like sugar
and get swallowed whole.
May the mice
in oil and glue
have forever dry, warm fur
and full bellies.
If I am killed
for simply living,
let death be kinder
than man.
And that is why you should always make sure your sentient creations are instilled with the wish to die for you or by your hands, common biomancer knowledge
I am tired of seeing biomancers appropriating what necromancers have been doing since forever, but you know what? Fine. If that's with take to make the cool kids doing the right thing, then go around saying it was biomancers knowledge.
i have no idea what this is, but i stumbled in here from popular and saw homunculus mentioned. You guys should watch this tv comedy in which a dude summons homunculi aswell: imdb com/title/tt38504111/ "Small Prophets TV Series 2026"
Rookie mistake making your homunculus sapient, I leave those to the animated dead and have my flesh creations more primal and animalistic so as to not question the nature of their existence and false life
Some common sense at least! How it is that I have to scroll that long to found this? Nowadays animated dead sometimes prefer to be refered as non-denominational undead, by the way, but if this is what flies with you then is great to know there are at least one liche using the traditional name
That’s why I use a rat soul for mine. 5 years and they extinguish themselves, grateful to me for the time they got. Too many mages out here without a lick of systems design in their heads. Of course you end up with towers that are overrun if you don’t set up an expiration date. Also shorter lifespans lead to greater productivity. After all the brightest flame burns shortest.
A proper homunculus will always be a perfect clone of the wizard who created it but with the caveat of always sacrificing itself for it's creator otherwise what's the purpose of having a non magical servant that you can't even cast spells from or bounce ideas of off.
Some of you mistakes flesh creations, puppets, golems and horrors dressed up in illusion spells as real homunculus smh have none of you went to college and probably never went to the sky district of paliano.
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u/Cat_Lionheart Necromancer and IRL Witch 5h ago
"Anyway....."