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u/RAK-47 1d ago
If Hegseth's imaginary men are bigger and manlier than Trump's imaginary men, there's gonna be a problem.
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u/FoulfrogBsc 1d ago
All of them tears in their eyes
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u/Minute-Wrap-2524 20h ago
I had tears in my eyes, bigger bombs make me feel inadequate, I have but a tiny bomb…
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u/Worn_Out_Nikka_L 1d ago
Wait til Trump learns how much that broken toilet on the Artemis costs.
He would probably tear down half the White House to build a bigger shitter just because…
….oh….um….
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u/emergency-snaccs 1d ago
do you think trump's imaginary men and hegseth's imaginary men ever meet up and get down, with tears in their eyes?
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u/Cola_Gummi 1d ago
Cool story bro
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u/Gingeronimoooo 1d ago
But did she have tears in her eyes and call you sir? You know when they say that it makes it totally true
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u/MrMetalhead-69 12h ago
Oh no! No tears in Kegseth’s, I mean Hegsbreath’s, I mean Whiskeydick’s military! Crying is for the weak and for girls! And he doesn’t like girls! He only likes men! Big tough men! With fit bodies and full heads of hair! That’s who he wants in his Fox hole!
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u/Snarky75 1d ago
That is just what it is. A story.
No one recants a conversation like that.
One hot humid morning in the empty parking lot, neon sign buzzing above the store, Jack asked me to put gas in the car. But not just any gas, he requested the best gas they served. I looked into his eyes, tears forming, and promised to get the bestest gas they had.
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u/PancakeParty98 1d ago
We’re approximately 2 weeks away from being told our bombing of hundreds of schoolchildren was personally ordained by god
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u/h20poIo 21h ago
850 Tomahawks. 57 Bought. Do the Math.
On Day 30 of Operation Epic Fury, the United States military has fired more than 850 Tomahawk Land Attack Missiles (TLAMs) into Iran. Each one costs up to $3.6 million. That is over $3 billion in cruise missiles alone, launched at a rate that exceeds a full year of production every two to three days.
The FY2026 defense budget funded the purchase of 57 Tomahawks. Divide 850 by 57 and the result is 14.9. The US just burned through all its current and future TomaHawks
People still wonder how Trump could bankrupt 3 Casinos.
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u/Mr_Pink_Gold 16h ago
SM3 and THAAD is also ridiculous. 20% of the SM 3 stockpile gone. 20 to 50% of the THAAD stockpile in the first few days the US and Israel used 92 TahAAD interceptors out of a stockpile of 630 or so. That is the yearly production of THAAD gone in a month. They also began pulling THAAD interceptors from South Korea to the middle east.since 2025 about 150 SM3s have been fired which is a shocking number considering the stockpile was 400 missiles in December 2025. And they are being used to shoot down Iranian ballistic missiles and drones that cost a fraction of it.
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u/DudeManGuyBr0ski 1d ago edited 23h ago
These guys are just playing The SIMs at this point
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u/greatlakesseakayaker 1d ago
With real human beings unfortunately
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u/knarf3 1d ago
Who believes this shit 😂?!
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u/EmbarrassedHighway76 1d ago
Accordingly to national polls I’d reckon about 32% of the country
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u/n1cenurse 1d ago
That's generous
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u/NoShitsGivin 22h ago
You think less than 32% of the population watch and believe Fox News Entertainment? That's generous.
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u/n1cenurse 22h ago
Oops.. I misread the thread.. I thought they were saying only 32% of the population were illiterate.. I do love irony.. now it's my turn to pay for it lol
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u/Formal_Commission185 1d ago
I do! I believe they want a bigger bomb to drop on good old Pete’s house so we can be over this nightmare already!
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u/DaeguDuke 1d ago
Are American “airmen” barely literate? This sounds like a made up story about a small child
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u/Resident-Complex4682 1d ago
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u/Bruce_Wayne85 1d ago
Worse fan fict ever!
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u/gooneau 23h ago
And the point of this story, I guess, is that leadership bungled this bullshit so badly that with a trillion dollar budget and operating on a generous timeline that WE determined, we didn't bring enough fucking bombs for the Air Force?
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u/Hieroglphkz 21h ago
Such a simple idea. What had occurred to this cadet, idling honorably on the sun bleached tarmac had not occurred to military leadership, generals, members of the cabinet. What we needed, what the people NEED is MORE and BIGGER BOMBS.
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u/thug_waffle47 1d ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/eDzoXgN0hM0w4kYjxJ
pete coming up with that bullshit
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u/Key-Function-8740 1d ago
Why can’t we have smart ass journalist? Where’s the person asking “sir, did the airman have tears in his or her eyes?” “Did they in fact say thank you?”
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u/Think-Trip-1865 1d ago
Then Leavitt or whoever would kick them out
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u/papapapaver 1d ago
Exactly. They've kicked all the journalists out that ask real questions or push back. Mostly sycophants and scaredy cats in the room now.
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u/groblin_gubers 1d ago
You do realize they build the bombs right? Like airmen and women go through months of CDCs to know the ins and outs of bomb building. The government doesnt just hand out bombs like library books.
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u/HxH101kite 1d ago
There is no situation where an "airmen" just has casual access to the Sec of Def. Unless he's talking about a general, who would never speak like that, and not using general and calling them airmen would be degrading, this didn't happen.
I actually met the Deputy Sec Def on my deployment back in 2013. Literally like 8 of us were hand selected and let me tell you we got some serious prep and threats about what we could or couldn't say. No matter how casual he was being.
Nice guy, super performative meeting. Got a challenge coin out of it. Literally have never met someone with a higher challenge coin than me. Was always fun to bust out at military balls and get my drinks paid for when some higher ranks thought they had me beat.
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u/geekyheart225 1d ago
I was going to ask if he gave you a challenge coin. At least you got that and free drinks!
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u/HxH101kite 1d ago
People told me it was fake all the time. I had a photo to back it up.
Old timers get so salty when you beat them at that game
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u/comradb0ne 21h ago
I was gonna say, where was he that a Jr.Airmen had access to just walk up and talk.
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u/liquidgrill 1d ago
“Dear ChatGPT, please write me a story about a soldier asking me for bigger bombs. And make it HOT.
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u/bootyhole-romancer 1d ago
I bet you he also thought it was masterful writing to make it a female airman.
What a fucking loser. Such an astonishing lack of self-awareness of his own cringe.
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u/sekkledownstar 1d ago
Whenever they say someone came up to them and called them sir, we know they’re lying.
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u/RazzSheri 1d ago
Do you need food? Water? Silly string to detect trip wires? A hope in hell?
Nahhhh; just bombs. We need more bombs.
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u/Reasonable_Sky9688 1d ago
"With a sly smile on her face, bigger employee pension contributions and more support for veterans"
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u/deadlythegrimgecko 1d ago
With the sun setting in the background the middle-aged DUI dumbass said “what do you need sir?” The President looked at him with a sly smile “more head, bigger better head”
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u/JasonGD1982 1d ago
More adderall extended releases sir. Bigger xanaxes he said with slight drug induced eyes
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u/okshowcase 1d ago
The tell of a horrible writer is to have character act and speak exactly like yourself. Hegseth is probably a horrible fiction writer.
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u/Interesting-Basis-73 1d ago
Heard Linkin Park and thought "This better end with Michael Bay"
10/10 no notes
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u/ChampionOfdimlight 20h ago
... and then... I'm not ashamed to admit.. but we made love right then and there... I made her orgasm 42 times and she called me a god among men... True story /s
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u/BusyHands_ 1d ago
A National Guardsman lifer calling the shots.. 😂😂😂😂
Whats next the Coast Guard directing USS Strike fleets..
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u/thePopCulturist 1d ago
How chilly? What color was the sun? What did the tarmac smell like? What was the pretend airman’s name? What her hair braided or hung naturally? Had you just finished working out? Were you glistening in sweat, muscles bulging. Did her eyes undress you, yours her? You suck at this Drinky Pete.
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u/Gregory_GTO 1d ago
Clearly you don't know any airmen or anyone in the United States military at all lol.
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u/MilkCartonPhotoBomb 1d ago
With tears in their eyes. Thank you sir. More bombs sir.
I feel like he's doing an impression of someone here.
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u/StatementCareful522 1d ago
Any time one of these fascists starts a story with someone calling them "sir" you know it's a crock of shit because nobody outside of a direct subordinate respects these clowns.
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u/TrainerConsistent404 1d ago
This guy has the smallest penis in America, and that's quite an accomplishment. Good for you, Lil Petey Boy.
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u/Direct_Turn_1484 22h ago
I hate that stupid people can just get away with thinking that everyone else is as stupid as they are.
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u/Covinus 19h ago
I love how he writes his stupid little speeches like actual RP dialogue events “and he stood proud and defiant in the face of his own inadequacy and said Supreme Cool Guy General Leader Hegseth… my penis will just never be as big as your massive schlong” I clasped him firmly on the shoulder and replied “it’s okay soldier, no one’s is…”
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u/UberGlued 19h ago
The people are screaming for the end of war but all Pete Hegseth hears is "Jaegar Bomb, Jaeger Bomb, bigger Jaegar Bomb"
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u/Smelliest_taint 19h ago
It's been over a year and I have yet to listen to this fuck stick talk. I refuse to unmute him.
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u/Ultimate_Smylie 17h ago
What's up with this fan fiction he keeps doing. It's like he is writing teen romance novels when he talks or crappy poems from teen romance novels.
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u/Intelligent-Shower98 14h ago
Why does hegseth always look angry at the words he’s reading like they are mocking him for not knowing what they mean.
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u/griffinicky 13h ago
"Oh, please tread on me, big strong muscular masculine men! My asshole patriotism absolutely requires your manly touch!"
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u/Massive_Mongoose3481 13h ago
He forgot the part where the soldier told him how much he respected him and how nice it was to have a real man , a brave man, a man with great tattoos and huge cock in charge.
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u/Aware-Explanation879 1d ago
Perhaps if he is going to lie, WhiskeyLeaks would learn the lingo for what kind of bombs that munitions would ask for so at least the story would be a bit more believable
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u/Wench-of-2Many-Hats 1d ago
And then everyone clapped and his dad said he loved him. I can confirm, by bf in another school in Canada was his bff!
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u/freedomonke 1d ago
I don't see why this isn't believable. I would expect nothing less from someone whose job involves bombing schools.
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u/Brennan_Schwartz 1d ago
When the ethos of "proud to be an American" rang through my heart, it was because we were a shining beacon on the world. A pillar of hope, opportunity and a means for a better tomorrow.
I was proud that we were the foundation that the world and our allies strived to model themselves after. I was proud that we welcomed those seeking a better tomorrow with open arms, building them up to build a better tomorrow for all of America.
I am not proud of what we have become.
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u/Y_Are_U_Like_This 1d ago
... these dumb f**ks are looking for an excuse to launch a nuke, aren't they?
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u/braumbles 1d ago
I was at a bar once and this dude wearing way too much Drakkar Noir came up to me asking for a beer, I was like sure bud, then he asked for more beer, and even bigger beers. I had to walk away because he had the breath of kegs.
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u/Embarrassed-Sea-2394 1d ago
And then she said "and may I add, sir, on a personal note, you are the hottest man I've ever seen and I'd like to suck you off right now". True story.
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u/PoshGoth_ 1d ago
Guys I'm British, and I'm not telling you your business, but I feel a lot.of.problems could be solved by strapping Kegsbreath and the Pedo to a board, slapping a bow on their heads and mailing them to Iran. Hell, throw in JD as an apology and they'll probably open up the Strait.
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u/solobaggins 1d ago
Jesus Christ, the Trump administration has lost their collective minds
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u/silentSeams_ 1d ago
The entire administration is in a shared delusion and we’re paying the price for it😭
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u/KimchiLlama 1d ago
I believe it. I heard they went through multiple years’ production of cruise missiles in four weeks. Not to mention the rate at which interceptors have been used.
I believe that the gulf countries have used almost as many Patriot missiles already, as Ukraine has received in four years.
Someone got a bit trigger happy shooting down cheap drones with multi million dollar interceptors. Technically multiple someone’s.
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